Get The Picture? By Sherry Hopkins

Published 12:00 am Friday, April 24, 2009

Get me out of your dreams!

Dear Don has been having some pretty weird dreams lately. He dreams he is being chased by aliens and werewolves (he watches waaay too much SCI-FI TV.)

I don’t have any problem with him having dreams like those except I’m always in his dreams being chased by the same frightening oddball characters. I don’t appreciate being in his dreams and have asked him to please take me out of them. His response is typical Dear Don.

“You need help,” he said, “frontal-lobe-lobotomy, serious- time-on-a-shrink’s-couch help.”

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“Why, just because I want out of your dreams?” I asked, incredulously.

“Yes, you nut job, anybody knows you can’t control your dreams or who or what is in them,” he responded.

Well, ouch! That sure hurt.

“Why can’t you dream about Jamaica or Prince Edward Island or an Atlantic cruise for goodness sake? Maybe you could be a roadie for Aerosmith and I could come along,” I went on and on.

“But these are my dreams and I dream about my stuff, not your stuff. You can’t tell me what to dream. Dream your own Jamaican-cruise- ship, concert-tour dreams and leave mine alone,” he snapped back.

“Well you started it by including me in your stupid nightmares. I wouldn’t call them dreams. Dreams are things that make you happy like retirement, puppies and ice cream sundaes and they don’t include a lot of fictional scary things,” I told him.

“My dreams are not scary, therefore they are not nightmares by classification,” he said.

“And aliens and werewolves are not fictional, where’d you get that idea?”

“On the other hand, I do have nightmares and they are scary about snakes and badguys and I try to call out for help and because it is a nightmare I can’t’ call out, I just mumble like my mouth won’t form words,” he continues.

“Yeah, I know those nightmares. Did you know that I have stopped waking you when you have one in hopes that the badguys will eventually get you and I can finish my sleep uninterrupted?” I informed him.

“Are you kidding me?”  Dear Don asked,  “that’s just wrong. Like I said before, you need help.”

“Do you ever wonder why you have those dreams and what they represent?”  I asked after he calmed down.

“No, I don’t believe all dreams or nightmares are a representation of unconscious wants, desires and fears,” he responded.

“But you do believe in werewolves and aliens without reservation huh?” I asked.

“Let’s leave fiction and nonfiction out of this conversation ok?” Dear Don begged.

“Well if we do that what ever will we talk about?” I snickered.

“What about what’s for supper?” he wanted to know.

“Oh, that reminds me of a dream I had last night.”

You get the picture.

(Contact Sherry at