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Just because you can’t hear, doesn’t make it silent

By Ricky Swindle

Muffler Shop Musings

Howdy, friends!

If you remember my last column, I explained the fact that I have no claim of being a writer, only a storyteller.

My storytelling art is a hereditary gift I received from my late father, Hubert Swindle. He was a dandy at telling a good story or just making a good story out of a joke.

I am going to attempt to re-tell one of his joke/stories with a 2020 twist to fit the times we are experiencing these days. So, here goes:

This masked up prim and proper lady had a 2 p.m. doctor’s appointment. When she arrived at the office there was multiple people waiting. She informed the clerk that it was 2 p.m. and that being her exact appointment time.

The receptionist apologized and said the wait shouldn’t be too long, and she was welcomed to wait there or in her vehicle.

So, looking down the nose of her mask at the others there waiting she whips out a disinfectant wipe and proceeds to vigorously clean the chair she is about to sit in.

She tosses the wipe in the garbage and takes out a bottle of hand sanitizer to clean off that residue, sits down, arms folded around her gigantic purse while looking down all condescending at the other awaiting patients.

Fifteen or so minutes pass by and she is finally called by the nurse to come to the examining room. Once inside, the same cleaning procedure takes place in that room for another 10 minutes until the doctor comes in the room.

The doctor asks “Well, what seems to be the trouble today?”

She replies “Doctor, I’m suffering from severe gas attacks. They hit me out of nowhere. Just silent attacks.”

The doctor with his pad in hand wrote her a prescription. She asked “Doctor, will this cure my gas attacks?”

He says “No ma’am, but it’ll clean that wax out of your ears”.   

He turned that story out 50 different ways over the years and it was funny every time.

Civitan Radio Day is Nov. 7. As I have stated before our club is in the same 2020 pandemic predicament all clubs are suffering from this year and that being not having the opportunity to fundraise.

Members are coming around now to our loyal business folks who have so graciously and generously supported our club year after year. If you can help us, we sincerely appreciate it. If you can not this year, we understand and we will pray for you to have a better 2021.

Friends, take care of yourselves and give a hand up to your neighbor every chance you can.