There is an old saying, If wishes were horses beggars would ride. Dear Don would not only ride, but his feet would never touch the ground. He wishes a lot.

The problem as I see it is that he wishes for silly things. I, on the other hand never wanting to waste a wish, do so on a much larger scale.

For example, Dear Don wishes Joe Birch, news anchor on the local NBC station in Memphis, would not wear a gray suit and gray tie. Now Dear Don is not a fashionista by any stretch but yet chooses to waste a wish on Joe Birch and his choice of clothing. He has similar issues with Brian Williams on the NBC Nightly newscast in that he wishes Brian would not wear so many striped ties. There again, in my humble opinion, another wasted wish.

He has a regular litany of wasted wishes. Like, I wish the sun would shine, I wish the weather were warmer, I wish it would stop raining. He wishes something worthwhile were on the TV, the sun would not shine, and that the weather was not so warm and wishes there was not so much to watch and record on the satellite. He also wishes for Zinger cupcakes, Hostess orange cupcakes and carrot cake while in the same breath wishing to rid himself of ten extra pounds.

His biggest wasted wish is for the quick release of X-Files III. That is not only a wasted wish but also a waste of time and money.

Me and my holier-than-thou desires are not wasted on trivial pursuits. I wish for world peace, the end to war and hunger, and comfortable shoes. I wish that my grandsons would stay young and innocent and never have an unpleasant moment in their life.

I wish my hair would hurry up and get long and that my waist would get smaller without intervention. I wish for a long healthy life or a short painless death.

Dear Don is sitting here as I write “assisting” me in this endeavor. He says I need to add that he has had two wishes come true lately. The first that Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band would tour again and that Ursula Madden on Channel 5 news would get a nightly anchor spot. What’s up with him and the anchor folks? That’s a sure sign of getting old when you watch a lot of news and weather.

He reminds me of wishes that have come true for me lately as well. I wished that the old movie “A Tree Grows in Brooklyn” would come on TV and I wished for those confounded cherry Laffy Taffys one day last week and he surprised me with a bag full.

“Do you ever wish for anything big?” I prod.

“Well, ‘bout the biggest thing I could wish for is that Jesus would come back soon.”

Not much more to add to that now is it?

You get the picture.

(Contact Sherry at swhcsc@wildblue.net)