I need a break. From ME!

This summer seems like it has already been 6 months long. I have gotten myself into some real pickles of late.

I should be embarrassed to write about it, but you know there may be another poor soul out there who is feeling “like an old lady,” and can relate to me.

About three weeks ago I decided that the hedges bordering the front porch needed trimming. So I got out early one morning before the sun tried to burn me alive and set up my electric trimmer and my tarp to catch the trimmings and got to work. I was on a roll and the job was going to go faster and be easier than I had first thought.

I moved up to the porch to trim the long sprigs growing between the porch rails. I leaned over the rails and swooshed the trimmer easily from left to right. In the blink of an eye and before I could react, the trimmer was gnawing straight thru Dear Don’s good extension cord. Sparks were flying and the trimmer was dead. At least I had sense enough to unplug the thing before I did anything else.

I quickly rolled up the cord and ran it to the trash receptacle hoping to avoid telling Dear Don for as long as possible. Then I thought, ”maybe it can be fixed.”

So I called my Uncle Phil who can fix anything and relayed the jam I was in. “I’ll take a look”, he said.

He came later that day and got the cord. Sure enough, a couple of days later he brought it back good as new.

In the meantime I had to tell Don and I knew he was going to be unhappy. Not so much about the good cord but because I could have hurt myself. Well, my feelings were surely hurt but I was unscathed.

After explaining in much humble detail, Don made me promise that I would leave the electric trimmer in the shop and the trimming to him. I promised. Really, I promised.

Only days before I had dropped the blower and broke the cage covering the fan all to pieces. I glued it back but still I had been careless that time as well.

So this past Friday the weather was unexpectedly cool and dry for August  and I was full of energy. I went outside at 6:30 a.m. and began to work. Around 11 or so I noticed that my azaleas could use a haircut.

I got the trimmer out. I know I promised not to but I did just the same and in my mind I was helping. Besides I’ve learned my lesson and would keep the bright orange cord w-a-a-a-y out of the way of the trimmer.

Just as I got to the last bush I took a great swipe towards the back to finish up the task. This time I cut the internet cable in half.

The cable was attached to the shop wall and was SLIGHTLY hidden by the overgrown bush. OK, maybe it wasn’t hidden, and maybe it has been there for many years, and maybe it is black and the shop is bluish gray and maybe, just maybe I was not paying close attention. Maybe!
I threw the trimmer down and ran to the house and down the hall to Dear Don’s office. I clicked on the internet and a message came up saying ,”Uh, hey you. Stupid, you just cut the cable in two. YOU DON’T HAVE INTERNET!!!!!”

That wasn’t exactly the message but it was pretty close.

To shorten this already too long story, the cable was repaired on the following Sunday morning. They had to dig up my yard, they tracked mud in my house and charged me $80 bucks to boot.
Don has hidden the trimmer in his shop.There were ugly looks and words to go with my confession. If I go after them again, I may need to find another home.

It isn’t easy being me.